October 25, 2003
Did I mention I love quizzes?
Your magical style is Priestess.
What type of Magic do you work?. Take the Magical Style Quiz by Paradox
October 22, 2003
Hrm
You are Form 1, Goddess: The Creator.
"And The Goddess planted the acorn of life.
She cried a single tear and shed a single drop
of blood upon the earth where she buried it.
From her blood and tear, the acorn grew into
the world."
Some examples of the Goddess Form are Gaia (Greek),
Jehova (Christian), and Brahma (Indian).
The Goddess is associated with the concept of
creation, the number 1, and the element of
earth.
Her sign is the dawn sun.
As a member of Form 1, you are a charismatic
individual and people are drawn to you.
Although sometimes you may seem emotionally
distant, you are deeply in tune with other
people's feelings and have tremendous empathy.
Sometimes you have a tendency to neglect your
own self. Goddesses are the best friends to
have because they're always willing to help.
Which Mythological Form Are You?
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October 15, 2003
A New Day Begins
And so does my list of what I've done today to further the cause:
12:00 AM - 2:00 AM
Grand List Run Through
Grand List Run Through
Grand List Run Through
Added New Blog to Grand List (an "o")
Re-coloured Grand List
Created new blog in server
Created new blog in Domain
Created new author for new blog
Created new email account
Added new blog to Index blog
Emailed user new blog information
Emailed user new email information
Added new blog to Grimoire
Grand List Run Through
October 14, 2003
Today So Far
As of this posting so far today I have done the following:
Added Xaero to the Benefactor Banner Page
Replaced all the white links pages except general/technical/legal with the grey
Replaced the Grand List of Blogs logo
Added the Grand List Link to About BoRCom
Created a new blog
Created new email for new blog
Emailed new user about blog
Emailed new user about email
Updated the Grand List with the new blog (A "c")
Updated the Index blog with new blog
Updated the Grimoire with new blog
Loaded the Banner Benefactor page
Ran through Grand List 5 times to find new entries to update Grimoire
Emailed Stormbringer to let him now of his sponsorship & see where he's been
Received email about a banner rotation,
Replied to email about banner rotation, giving and receiving.
Filled out application to add BoRCom to the DMOZ Open Directory Project.
Filled out application to be an editor for the DMOZ Open Directory Project.
I think that's it so far, it's only 3:38. No wonder I'm tired.
Additons as of 5:30
Four more run-throughs of Grand List, 4 updates to Grimoire
Re-submitted my application for an empty category to DMOZ, ALL over again
Signed up for ICE-MAN banner exchange
Added PD Forums to Grimoire
Added an Affiliate Banner Page
Created the Affiliate Banner Page
Made Affiliate Logo
Made small ICE-MAN graphic
Made small Kyndig graphic
Added ICE-MAN to Banner Affiliates
Added Kyndig to Banner Affiliates
ONWARD!
6:04 Scan of Grand List
6:08 Grimoire Update
6:12 Grimoire Update
6:35 Scan of Grand List
October 13, 2003
In the Cave with Ye
I'm not in the best of spirits so those who happen to wander past this who look for happy happy crap, this is not the entry. I'm not in a hostile mood or depressed, just a sort of general blah. More discouraged and a bit sad but not depressed. There's a definite difference between sad and depressed in my twisted book.
The blog site is picking up, so much so that it became apparent it was way past time to get the facelift going on the roleplay index blog. It's not hideous but it looks really amateur and as my familiarity with MT and template layout grows, it looks more and more like an eyesore. Can't have an eyesore for an index page, first impressions matter. I've been putting off the conversion to .php because SQL scares me. I don't know it well enough.
I think discouraged is a good word. I'm feeling unusually discouraged. I feel very much alone without being lonely. *smirks* More contradictory Kittyn-isms. I'm not lonely, there are plenty of people and emotions in my life. Yet alone.
I used to have this friend who isn't in my life anymore. Although I found out after the departure that his reasons weren't altogether pure, this friend was always really interested in whatever my latest meshugenah idea was. And sometimes the ideas are actually good ones, like these blogs. Yet this friend was always the first to ask what was going on and become involved in it and know enough about it without knowing it inside and out.
Lately I feel like I have to ask people to care, to show some enthusiasm for the things that are my breath of life. And I'm not one to ask for things, especially caring. And no, it's not a pity party, just reflecting. I don't want to go on and on and bore people with stuff but when it's the stuff that makes me want to get up and conquer the day, the stuff that lights my soul, the stuff I plan to nurture into something lasting and professional I just feel kind of hurt when it seems no one really cares. They care because it's me and they care for me but not for the work itself, the big picture.
Bleh, this isn't coming out right and I sound whiny. Ok, here's an example. I'm a highly tuned-in Piscean empath and I can't expect the world to be like that but when someone talks about something incessantly for months, I tend to remember. Let's say my best friend and a movie. I could prattle off all the movies he's waiting for, had waited for, etc. There's a movie I've been waiting for since July, Wrong Turn. I've been talking about it every day for a week and when I mention tonight to get 'the movie' tomorrow, I get "what movie?" Or when I come around the people in the world I feel the closest to and I'm all full of ideas flowing out of my mouth and enthusiasm and one says nothing and another just nods. Or my partner in the servers and the blogs who hasn't taken the time to even post in the blog or know which URL the Grimoire is at or RealPlay.
I would have known the movie. I would have jumped on the enthusiasm wagon and I would have known the links and posted. Not because I think I'm better than anyone but because I care and I want to be a part of their lives, not just an idea board. Active in what the people I care about care about.
And this isn't about romance, it's more about a confidante, a partner in ideas, someone to share in the struggles and triumphs. It's like getting the lead in the school play and knowing that although it's a full house, there isn't one person in the audience there to see you. Alone but not lonely, sad but not depressed. Keeping more and more thoughts inside my head instead of speaking them, I'll be posting more here.
I don't want to bore people or bother people with my latest obsession, I don't want the people I care the most about feeling obligated to opine or feign interest to spare my feelings. But I guess I'm neither as stoic or strong as I thought I was and it does sting. I don't want to be one of those people other people avoide because they talk too much about the same thing over and over and expect you to care.
So off into my cave I crawl and I'm going to pull a Tom Hanks and name a pillow Wilson and talk to it for hours on end about all that's currently going around in my head making me dizzy.
WILSONNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!
October 05, 2003
Death by Rock Concert?
So I've been driving everyone crazy with this concert thing. Well, Sparky, that's why you have a blog.
On the offhand chance that some random being will read this, let me offer a bit of history. There's a band in Florida called Hell on Earth. They're not particularly successful, I had never heard of them before all this hooplah.
I'm not sure when the story broke but I heard about it last month. Hell on Earth apparently has a terminally ill fan who wants to commit suicide on stage at one of their concerts. I don't know how he's planning on doing it, they've kept that very hush hush. The concert is supposed to be broadcast live onto their website, basically offering up a free online suicide watch to those who have the want or stomach.
This of course got everyone in an uproar; the news media, the moralists, the anti assited suicide crew, the pro assisted suicide crew, the religious freaks and the politicians. Doesn't help that the leader of the band is a bonehead who makes himself look like an opportunistic ghoul who sees nothing wrong in making some profit off of a terminally ill person's plight.
The band claims they're doing this to advocate the rights of the terminally ill to end their own suffering. That's the part that burns me.
The concert was supposed to be tonight, split into two locations and streamed live on the site. Apparently something happened to the site, the host claims they didn't pull it but the offered excuse of flood spam from Japan seemed a bit improbable.
The concert is now re-scheduled for next weekend, we'll see what happens then.
And disgusting as it is, I was there tonight looking for the stream. I can't say for sure I would have watched it but I probably would have. Not to celebrate gore or support the freak band but as an observer of life and its sometimes seedier sides. I didn't want to watch the Daniel Pearl video either but I did.
It bothers me on a personal level. Assisted suicide is one of my pet causes, it's something I believe verystrongly in and has been for a long time. Were I terminally ill past the point of no return I wouldn't want some healthy fat cat political ethicist telling me it's a sin to end my suffering with my friends and family around me. We've have made a trauma out of death, there are countries overseas where death is not viewed as this sad horrific experience where we go to miserable wakes and such only to increase survivor sadness. It's a noble gesture that only the truest of friends can offer, to help end the suffering of a friend which brings on their own suffering.
Things like this concert and its cheap glamourising of the bastardised assisted suicide it's doing only makes the cause even harder to justify and fight for. The right wing is already ruling this country and assisted suicide is way down the food chain as they battle same-sex marriages and a decent working wage so people can support their families. But this gives a whole lotta fuel to the moralists for their holy fires.
I'm still not sure if I'm going to watch if they go through with it next weekend, as strongly as I feel on the matter I probably will and then be disgusted with myself after for watching it. But I wanted to prattle on about this a bit because it's really been on my mind and we'll see what happens as the week goes on.
I'd love opinions if anyone's out there.
WK
October 04, 2003
ERASURE!
Star
We go waiting for the stars
To come showering down
From Moscow to Mars
Universe falling down
You got to look real hard
There's a fiery star
Hidden out there somewhere
Not the satellite of love
But a laser
Shooting out it's shiny tongue there
God is love, God is war
TV-preacher tell me more
Lord redeem me, am I pure?
As pure as pure as heaven
Sent you money sent you flowers
Could worship you for hours
In whose hands are we anyway?
Go waiting for the stars
To come showering down
From Moscow to Mars
Universe falling down
You got to look real hard
Is it in your heart?
Yeah it's in there somewhere
The power wrapped in your palm
Show it to me
Hit them with your wrath and thunder
What's your pleasure?
Tell it to me
How did you know?
Show your beauty
In you somewhere, somewhere in me
Pure as pure as heaven
Sent you money sent you flowers
Could worship you for hours
In whose hands are we anyway?
Yeeha
Rolling along through a rose coloured glow
The city looks pretty in pink
Armageddon is here!
Did you ever have a lover
Leave you for another
To take your love and kisses for granted?
Never to discover
War is not the answer
Leave you only disenchanted
God is love, God is war
TV-preacher tell me more
Father help me am I pure?
As pure as pure as heaven
Sent you money sent you flowers
Could worship you for hours
In whose hands are we anyway?
Go waiting for the stars
To come showering down
From Moscow to Mars
Universe falling down
Go waiting for the stars
To come showering down
From Moscow to Mars
Universe falling down
Go waiting for the stars
To come showering down
From Moscow to Mars
Universe falling down
October 01, 2003
Even the gods don't want me.
The gods don't really like you because you are no
fun. They gave you books and schoolwork to
keep you busy so you wouldn't bother them. And
when that doesn't work, they get rid of you by
sending you off to make money. They'll make
you comfortable though. They want you happy so
you won't come looking for them.
Do the gods hate you?
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