Food.

It is the time of year that food seems to come out of the woodwork. It began today with a work Thanksgiving potluck. I cannot describe the massive amounts of food that were present. Needless to say, the thought of having another one of these “feasts” tomorrow makes me want to curl up and die.

I am not a picky eater, but I swear if I see one more fucking green bean casserole I will throw it into the face of the person who made it, little crispy onion bits and all. Whoever thought of this monstrosity ought to be fucking shot. At the pot luck today there were two separate green bean casseroles.

Let me lead up a bit here. I did not know what this concoction was until I entered College. My mother never made casseroles like this. EVER. I realize why now. It is a foul thing. Let’s take mushy canned green beans and stew them in more mushy cream of mushroom soup. Then to trick people into thinking they are eating a pile of gooey slop, we’ll sprinkle fried onions over it. It’s wrong. Vegetables should have texture. Not only does green bean casserole fail to have texture, but due to the copious cooking process, it also fails to have flavor. It tastes like aluminum can.

So, my first time tasting this concoction I about spit it out. But I choked on it and smiled sweetly at the person who was ever so proud of making it. Then, at every single pot luck I’ve been to for work, this horrible excuse for a vegetable dish turns up. And every time I choke on it and smile like it is something worthy of being ingested,

This foul creation should be stricken from cook books round the world. Never should green beans be steamed, then baked in soupy liquid. It should be banned. For the longest time I thought I hated green beans. Then I had fresh wonderful green beans and realized that people are stupid with their vegetables.

These days, my husband and I eat no vegetables out of a can. All our veggies are fresh cooked and never boiled or steamed. We eat our veggies with flavor and texture and they are wonderful. They are also cheaper than canned veggies. Yum.

Simple Green Beans that don’t suck:

fresh green beans with the end chopped off
2 Tbsp Extra virgin olive oil
2 cloves garlic
pinch of salt
pinch of basil

Take a large pan and place it on the stove. Pour olive oil into it and warm it to a medium heat. Place 2 cloves of crushed garlic into the pan. Simmer garlic until caramelized. Add in fresh green beans. Toss green beans in oil and cook on high heat for about 5 minutes. Add a pinch of salt and a pinch of basil. Serve and enjoy.

Posted by Utopia at November 17, 2006 01:11 PM

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