Tedium. That is what my day has been thus far. I suppose that is the nature of work and I shouldn’t complain. I thought being a scientist would be more fun. I thought I would get to flex my brain a little bit and come up with creative and logical solutions to problems. I thought being in R&D would be nifty.

Apparently I was very wrong.

I’ve turned into a statistician/secretary. I have no other way to really describe what I’ve been doing for the past few months. Basic statistics and paperwork seem to be the basis for everything in my little world these days. Oh wait … and there was the exercise in futility at trying to train people to follow the procedures I wrote.

God, this is a lame entry with no purpose but to fucking whine.

Yech.

Let’s start over.

Getting healthy and the wickedly sinful meal of breakfast thwarting my attempts

I have been trying to get healthy. This isn’t as easy as it first sounds. You are supposed to eat 5-7 servings of fruits and veggies every day. A serving is about the size of a medium apple. This means I have to have two servings of fruits or veggies with every meal of the day to meet spec. That’s quite a lot when you think about it. Even my friend who is married to a vegetarian doesn’t eat that many fruits and veggies.

I have been trying, but it is an exercise in frustration. The hardest meal for me to include this requirement in is breakfast. There are so many tasty breakfast foods that do not include veggies. There are even less breakfast foods that include the required eating that I can make at work. There are fewer still items of veggie laden breakfast food that I want to eat.

I don’t think I can quite manage a whole serving of onion and peppers in my eggs.

Once again … whining tripe.

Let’s start again.

Bacon flavored chemicals

I have been trying to watch my caloric intake lately. This is in my quest to get healthy. When I start playing soccer again I won’t watch as closely, but for now, I should. Anyway, I found a salad dressing that has 0 calories, 0 grams of fat and no sugar in it. It is also bacon flavored.

I haven’t read the ingredients too closely because I know it can’t be natural.

But I eat it on my salad and it tastes like bacon. Bacon without guilt kicks ass. It also taste great on olives.

Have I ever mentioned that I love olives?

All kinds of olives. I have no olive prejudice. I love them. I love them stuffed with pimentos or jalapeños or even garlic. I love them with pits or without pits. I love them plain. Olives are nature’s perfect snacking food.

Speaking of snacking food. I never have any in my house. I don’t buy it. Okay, I don’t buy the generic version of snack food: crackers, chips, candy, ice cream, etc. On the rare occasion I buy Cheez-its for the Sparky. I think keeping snack food out of the house is a good thing. It encourages me to actually think before I eat something. I also don’t drink soda. Not because I don’t like it mind you, but because it makes me violently ill. It’s some weird combination of the carbonation, corn syrup, and caffeine I suspect. Or maybe the acid that burns a hole through your stomach. Of course, sometimes I suffer the pain to enjoy a chocolate coke or even more sinfully a coke float.

Growing up the closest thing we have to snack food was homemade beef jerky. I only got chip if I traded people for them. No one ever wanted to trade for them because I had nothing worth trade in my lunch. I never had Twinkies or ho-hos or moonpies. Sometimes I got graham crackers. I also never had bologna and cheese sandwiches. I think my mother had a thing against processed meat foods. Even when I started packing my own lunch at the tender age of 10, I didn’t have any of those things in my lunch because my mother wouldn’t buy them and you can’t put things in your lunch that you don’t have.

But, I was talking about bacon flavored chemicals and got a bit sidetracked.

I just wanted to say that bacon flavored chemicals rock on salad. Especially when you add olives to your salad. And cheese.

Cheese and bacon ought to be a sin … oh wait … it is.

Crazy Kosher laws thwarting my pleasures in life. Of course, I’m a bad jew so I don’t shirk from this most sin. Thus, I enjoy my burgers the way I want them along with my club sandwiches and salad.

Days 'til Blogathon: 10

Total Raised: $110.00

Number of Sponsors: 5

The 0 calorie bacon flavored chemicals compel you to sponsor me!

Posted by Utopia at July 19, 2006 01:48 PM

Comments

Posted by: jeckles at July 19, 2006 02:06 PM

Posted by: Mango at July 19, 2006 04:19 PM

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