This morning on my way to work, I was channel flipping as I tend to do when a report comes onto NPR that completely and totally loses my interest. Anyway, I was flipping and suddenly I heard it…

The Shutter Time porn music background.

I laughed aloud. I did not expect to hear porn music, let alone the Shutter fabulous porn music so early in the morning. The dj’s were talking about gadgets and such, but I only listened because of the Shutter music.

Hail Shutter and Jeckles for giving me something to giggle about in the morning before work. I thought it would make the rest of the day bearable. Instead, it just reminded me how much I want to stab people in the eye. The first thing I get when I sit down at my desk is a string of emails whose sole purpose is to drive the will to live right out of me.

Damn you cubicle ninjas … damn you. You planted the happy porn music just to make me see the stark contrast and remind me how grey everything here is. Then you planted the seeds of laziness in the people who were supposed to be doing work for me today. They want to put it off because it’s “too hard”. Well, cubicle ninjas, I will thwart you yet!

I will go to the break room and ingest my elixir of life and find myself rejuvenated to battle. I will eat my corn muffin and laugh in your general direction. I will shake my fist at you with my mighty rage. Cubicle ninjas, you will not prevail. I don’t care what you have brainwashed the other to say about me “behind” my back. I am not deaf and I do hear and I will not crumble to your will.

To you I say, bring it bitch. Bring it!

I will defeat you with Shutter porn music and my pirate fu. I will ram the fist of productivity so far up your ass, you’ll taste it.

Posted by Utopia at June 13, 2006 08:14 AM

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