I am of the mind that the recent return of the cancer has made me get that feeling that I am on my own helping mother again. It's times like this when I kinda feel like I am an only child. Not that I expect my brother to drop everything and return home (even though he's all of an hour away), before the surgery even occurs, but its like he's disconnected himself off in his own world and has no relation to the events going on unless you make sure you tell him.

I realize that we are different. Night and day. Extreme opposites to the point that we regularly tried to throttle one another while we were growing up, but it's times like this when I feel like we are miles apart.

I don't know what I expect really. When these things occur, I am the one that feels compelled to drop everything and run and help. I have done that with family, with friends, whoever. He needs to be asked/told what to do. I just feel that most of the time, people don't say what they need in these situations anyway, so how can you wait to be asked.

Anyway, I don't have the right to judge him, I don't know what he is feeling. I'm not in his head. I just needed to release the frustration, I guess.