June 22, 2005

In the zone?

Ok... Life isn't so bleak anymore. I don't know why I get into these funks...especially around my birthday. Maybe because I have so much in my head. I get frustrated. Like with the music. Everyday I'm haunted with songs... Melodies... Erie things that waft so beautifully in my mind like musical ghosts. It frustrates me that I don't do anything with it... Because I use the fact that I don't really play anything as my excuse. Did I take the time to learn the Fantom S dvd? No. Did I take the time to learn the 3 music programs I have? No. Did I do anything with Consecrate since last frikkin December? No.

Ok... So my car still sits as a heap in my driveway, Consecrate is totally useless at the moment and I'm about to have another birthday with nothing to show for it. Ok, I set stupid goals. "Give yourself a present." I said to myself. "Have the car fixed by or before your birthday. Have 2 songs (or at least ONE done by your birthday." Ok... So I blew that. But y'know what birthdays do? They give you a kick in the ass. So July 15th, I have made arrangements to have a weekend summit in the studio. Yes guys and ghouls, I caught up with my Engineer, Rob a.k.a. "J.J. Flash". Why Brian had me calling him Merlin, I'll never know. Merlin from Spectre is a totally different person. Either way, I've been feeling like a dick calling this guy Merlin. He must've thought I was an idiot or something... Or so totally eccentric that I make up names for people like I'm Michael Jackson.

Speaking of Michael... How about that verdict, huh? Hmmmmm...Heh... Michael. That's kinda funny the whole thing.

I was a big fan once. Still am. I have every album up to Invincible and The Number Ones. I was a DJ so I had allot of MJ 12 inches and CD singles. Many years ago, I was probably the best MJ impersonator in the County... I used to dream of meeting him, dancing alongside him... singing with him... But no longer. 1) He changed too much. 2) I grew up. The magic wears off after awhile. I respect his talent... admire what he's accomplished... adore his sheer genius. He helped me bust allot of racial barriers when I was younger... To many, Michael had no race even when he still appeared to be black.

I'm glad he got off. I don't think I could think of his life in jail. He'd have been on constant suicide watch. Let's hope he learns from this.

I for one get sick of the Thriller references made into puns. They need to remember he's had more albums than that. Yea yea yea.... He's a "smooth criminal" who "beat it". During the trial he must've been going "off the wall" staring at the "man in the mirror" with the world thinking he's "bad". Well it looks like he really IS "invincible" after all.

Meanwhile.... Life goes on. They still can't find Natalee in Aruba, Terry Schiavo is buried after her autopsy shows no foul play, a missing Boy Scout is found 5 days later in Utah, citizens lobby to bring our boys home, the Governator gets booed offstage. Child after child is abducted and found dead somewhere, victim of some sexual predator in some gooberville in the U.S. car bombs bake hundreds in the middle east ... Business as usual in the world of news... And yet... We spent months monitoring the MiJac trial. Go figure. Did we need to make our lives feel any better by either rooting for or against a celebrity?

Celebrity gossip as a whole is silly. Do you care if Ben and Jennifer broke up so he could go out with and secretly another Jennifer? Do you care that Angelina may have stolen Brad?

I don't know... Celebrity sensationalism is nothing new.... There's just more media now to cover it. They did it for Marilyn Monroe and all those stars both before and after her time... It ain't gonna stop now. I guess the best thing anyone can do is...turn it off.

Lately I've taken to late night MSNBC or FOX News shows. "Countdown" with Keith Oberman is one that makes me scritch my head. Dan Abrahms is another. That guy with the bow tie? I am NOT thrilled with his show. It just smells of yuppie scum trying to be overly intellectual and witty at the same time. BAH!

Anyway... Like I was saying. I'm feeling a bit better. Not because I'm having a birthday. Not because I'm not getting things done by then... But because I've simply restarted some forward motion. I feel best when I'm doing something artistic and even better when I'm in studio... Creating the future... Both yours and mine hopefully. I just like to make music.

By the way... If you have the chance, peruse the links here. My cat has a cute new blog with template design by Webkittyn. Go... Look.... NOW!!! Cute cats should not be kept waiting.

Posted by Darkstar at June 22, 2005 01:10 PM